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Saturday, January 30, 2010

This Is My Story







A few years ago I read a book called Blue Like Jazz. If you've never read it, you should put it on your reading list right away. It's that good. Now, I have just finished the newest book by the same author, Donald Miller, A Million Miles In A Thousand Years, and I cant stop thinking about it.



He writes about how everyone has a story, their life. But not everyone has a story that's worthy of a book or movie. You have little control, but some things can be changed. You can get a better story if you try.



Some day, God and I will sit and talk about my story. I'll tell him about the time Ivy and I stayed awake all night at Greenbelt lake because the Goatman was going to get us. He will remind me, the Goatman was really just a very loud bullfrog. We will laugh about what a silly little girl I was and how a teenager could be so dramatic. We'll talk about how my children made my heart dance and He will say I did the same for Him.



I will tell God about the night, six months after Lauren died, when I fell on my face and begged him to take it all away. I didn't think I could take the pain and emptiness any longer and I knew He, the God of the universe had the power to change it. He will say He knows. He was there. He was the still small voice saying no, I love you, But no. This is your story.



Ive done so many things wrong in my life. Some were stupid, thoughtless mistakes. Some where pre-meditated sin. All have been forgiven. God has edited them from my story, but He will not give me a re-write. This is where the story arcs. The character, forever changed, has to choose a path. Will she become bitter? Will she die in her sorrow. Or will find her joy again?
I didn't die. Jon and I grew old together and had a wonderful life. I got to see My kids happy with families of their own. And my grandchildren made my heart dance.
None of these things have happened yet, but I know they will. God's promised me my story has a happy ending.

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About Me

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A wife, mother, and spoiler of small dogs, I grew up in a small West Texas town, with my eyes full of sand, and my heart full of joy.


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