Hey Jude

Dead Boyfriends

My girls used to tell me all my stories end with, "and he died". Sometimes it seems to be true. Well, here's another one.
Looking back I probably had more boyfriends than what is considered normal. I don't know why. Maybe it's my nature to fall in and out of love with people as quickly as I do a new pair of shoes or really cool earrings. I'm not saying this is something to be proud of, by any means. A life like that tends to be littered with broken hearts and too many trips to Goodwill. Anyway for a time it seemed like those old boyfriends were dropping like flies. I can think of five who were gone before they turned 30. It's hard to know how to feel. If we were still friends, I grieved like anyone else. If not, I think I just tried not to think about it.
The thing is, not all relationships are deep. But then there is that one guy. The one I have referred to as "the man who tried to ruin my life". He made me as miserable as he made me happy. I waisted a million tears over him and when it was over it was like coming back from the dead. The last time I saw him, we spoke kind words and even apologized for what we had put each other through.
Over the years I have wondered where he was, now and then, but tried not to think about it too much. I would say horrible things like, I'm sure someones husband has killed him by now. The other day I was reading some newspapers online and saw his father's obituary. I read through to the survivors looking for his name, but he was not listed. Then, I saw it under the words, Proceeded in death by. I was shocked. He and his little brother had both died. I googled his name and found his obituary. He had died in 2006 just 3 weeks before my daughter. He was not married and had no children.
I feel so sad. I always thought we would run into each other some day and talk about our lives like in that Dan Folgelberg song, Same Old Lang Syne. And oh yes , he would hate that song. I have not let myself remember him for so long, and now I can't stop the memories.
I should have been praying for him all these years, instead of saying such terrible things. I wonder how he died. I wonder if he ever knew Jesus, and will I see him in heaven. I wonder if I should delete this post.

Is It Hot In Here, Or Is It Me?

Years ago, when I was a young, smart mouth adolescent, my mother said, "Sheila, sarcasm is not a virtue." to which I responded, "NO...Really??" What I learned from this experience was, the old woman could slap a knot on your head so big the doctor couldn't cut it off. I should have known better, as she had perfected that swing on the 7 children who came before me.

My poor mother lived with teenagers for eighteen years of her life, and I hit adolescence about the same time she started menopause. It was hard on both of us, but likely worse for her.

I realize this now, as I sit here, bursting into flames and trying not to cry. The change of life, or the onset of death, however you choose to look at it, it's a drag. It seems like only yesterday, I was driving too fast and running with scissors, unaware of being a mere mortal. I know what Mom would say. "Go put your lipstick on and you'll feel better".

Not A Pretty Subject

I have been dieting for several weeks now. I set a goal of 20 pounds at a time. That is, once I lost 20 pounds I would set my goal for the next 20. The problem was, I was stuck at 18. My husband was on the same diet, we ate the same food at the same time and he lost 33 pounds, while I remained at 18. Good news, I finally lost those last 2 pounds and made my 20 pound goal. Bad news, I did it by catching a stomach bug and throwing up for a couple of days. It worked for me, but I wouldn't recommend it.
The hard thing about being sick at my age, is the back and forth between a high fever and hot flashes. First I'm freezing, then I'm suffocating. The other thing is, not having my mother to baby me. Face it, we all need our moms when we are sick. My husband, armed with his can of Lysol, telling me I should stay in bed so the germs are contained to one part of the house, just doesn't do it for me.
Kid's are funny about sickness. I remember so many times, waking up with a child standing over me, saying Mom, I'm sick, just before barfing on my bedroom floor. It's like it didn't count if Mom didn't get to see it. Of course my husband would have to clean it up. It is well known in my family, that I will always barf when cleaning up barf.
You know how dogs can sense dog lovers, and those are the people they want to be with? Well I think children can sense which mother is the most irritated by their presence, and so they want to hang out at that mother's house. Well, one day all the little children of the world were in my front yard and I was in the kitchen with a crying, feverish, 18 month old Lauren. She threw up just as 3 year old, Sarah came in the door. Sarah ran back outside and I heard her say,"Y'all, Lauren just threw up!" Then, all the little children of the world came into my kitchen to see it.
I think my favorite kid throwing up story might be from my sister in- law Jane. Her kids, Cory and Aaron were little and sitting at the table having breakfast. Aaron, in his high chair, suddenly threw up in his plate. Cory hollered, "Mom, Aaron just threw up, can I have some more toast?"
My sister in- law, Sue, teaches 2nd grade. She told me once, the flu bug had gotten so bad at school, children were getting sick faster than it could be cleaned up. Finally they just started putting out orange cones, to mark where not to walk. I think about that every time I drive through construction.

A Tribute to Michael Young

Changes

I like to think of myself as flexible, someone who embraces change. But when change actually occurs I see I am not flexible at all. I become the old man in the coffee shop, complaining because they changed his coffee from Folgers to Seattle's Best. Seriously sir, that burning sensation gurgling up from your stomach to your esophagus may not be bitterness alone.
I love the Texas Rangers. They are my team and nothing will change that. However this talk of trading Michael Young has me very disturbed. Also, it's unfair to loyal fans who have stood by the team, even when they were not so great, to have to enter a "lottery" for a chance to buy tickets to the big games. I wanted to take my daughter, Sarah, to opening day because it was her birthday, but we didn't make the cut, or win the lottery. That's just wrong. Now I have received an email stating because we were not among the chosen few, we are on the list to possibly purchase tickets to other games. What the.........? This is not how Texans behave.
Now back to the Michael Young issue. The owners need to be as good to Michael as he has been to them. He's a great player who had a less than stellar late season. But he was still there, being a team leader and mentor to the younger guys. The club needs him. I only hope they don't treat him like they did Blaylock.
I'm partial to Michael because he was Lauren's favorite player. She saw great potential in him from the beginning, and she was right. It may sound silly or over dramatic, but I hate to see the things she loved going away. It's like she's disappearing along with them. Well, I still have her Curious George and her blue and yellow hoodie.

SNOW DAZE

I need a snow day. One like when we were kids and Mom waited to wake us up for school. She had heard the dreaded news earlier that morning and cherished the extra minutes of solitude while we were still sleeping.

We rarely had snow days. I think the schools got extra money from the state for staying open, something I've never understood. Anyway, I can only remember a few. We would play Monopoly until someone got mad and quit, or turned the board over, or threw the game pieces across the room. OK, that was usually me, but my brother, Steve always cheated. We never went outside to build a snowman or have a snowball fight. Snow falls in this part of the country are always accompanied by 50 mile an hour winds and a 40 below wind chill factor. Most of our weather can be described as extreme, no matter the season.
Christmas of 2000 we had one of those snow storms that literally shut down the city. We were living in the country and I, fortunately, was on vacation or I never would have made it in to work. My son, Eric was a freshman in college and home for Christmas break. He was miserable but I was very happy to be snowed in with my kids. The electricity went down several times, leaving us with a fire in the fireplace to keep warm and board games for entertainment. There was no MTV or PlayStation, we only had each other. Eric and Lauren went outside and dug tunnels in the snow until the cold was unbearable.
We are flatlanders out here. We have no hills or slopes whatsoever. But we do have interstate overpasses, and we had a big one by our house. Sarah, Lauren and I went for a walk and saw our neighbors with their sleds going down the side of that overpass. They invited us to sled with them and we had so much fun. The hard part was walking back up the hill to go again, as we are used to walking on flat land. I think that was my favorite snow day and I spent it with my kids.
Yes, I think I need a snow day.